Life through the eyes of a dead man.

Sometimes I can feel crushed under the weight of my life. Emotions, stress, school, relationships, responsibility, energy--it can all be pretty intense, and when you are feeling the weight of those things.... well, it feels pretty lame and sucky. You feel tired. There's no peace. Even sleep doesn't do the job. It's awful! I've been there before!

But recently I encountered a situation that had previously been a 'crushing' experience--one that it would be very difficult for me to encounter without feeling some sort of emotional/physical turmoil. I even started to spend some time that night laying in bed, just thinking about this situation...you know what i mean. Just thinking. No resolution, no helpful progression of thought, just immobile thinking. Lame! That keeps you up half the night!

But Christ began to show me how I was viewing this particular situation. My view was from my perspective--viewed through emotion, position, etc. Very limited in scope. He then asked me to look with Him at these things going on. It was like I was trying to look at something a mile or two away while standing in the forest. I could maybe see what it looks like and make decisions off of that, but Christ was desiring to take me up into a tower, an airplane, a satellite to show me that particular thing I was looking at.

When you're looking with Christ at something, your perspective changes. Completely. You see it from a different angle. "Ohhhhhhhh!" you say. You might see things surrounding it that you didn't before. "I didn't even see that there!" You actually see where YOU are in relation to that. "Huh! I prolly don't even need to worry about this right now!" Seeing things with Christ is absolutely wonderful!

So, after spending some time awake, sifting through immobile thinking, Christ actually wanted to take me to this place of looking with him. When I did, things just clicked into place. Where I had been unable to come up with a way to deal with this situation, Christ revealed the way. Where I was unsure about my position, Christ gave me peace. I was able to go back to the same exact situation the next day, totally convinced of my place in Him, and encounter it in a completely different way--a way not based what I see with me, but what I see with Christ.

This is for life. We're one with Christ. This is who we are now. "I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me."

'My viewpoint' is actually from a dead man's eyes. But Christ is actually giving me life, and giving me sight to see the things around me, and beyond the scope of what Zach can see alone. Praise Jesus.

Gimme my tuition back

Even though my professor was really cool, and it seemed like class would be fun, and there was quite an attractive young lady in the class, I still dropped the course when I found out it wouldn't transfer to Wayne (though I considered keeping the class for a good 8 seconds).

No worries, I still got Brit Lit 1 to keep me company for the next few weeks.

The focus of the Season

This semester is going to be very cool, but i anticipate it to be possibly/probably challenging. My life is going to be extremely focused for the next couple of months--3 major areas of my life will be centered around working with youth: my work (at the 'field Zone), my school (pre-student teaching), and at church (with the youth). I don't think my life has ever been this focused. It's pretty much youth and worship right now. The Lord hasn't really allowed there to be any room for focus on anything else right now--it's kind of crazy. Even though I've tried to pull things into it, they actually never came into fruition, and i was really frustrated as to why they weren't working...

...until I realized the focus of the season. There is some really intense stuff being put in front of me, and it's going to be awesome. Anything extra would really just be a distraction, and would hinder me not only in these areas of worship and youth ministry, but also hinder me in my ability to hold whatever-it-is up as well.

Let's face it. I've always had a huge desire for...well, ultimately a wife. I've spent years trying to put stuff together, to create the circumstance and relationship that would allow this desire to be fulfilled... and I've done a pretty bad job at it. The Lord has been clear--for MONTHS--that finding a spouse is NOT my focus right now, and I've actually gotten to the point where I believe him. It's kind of strange, to be honest. It changes behavior, it changes the grid of importance.

This has just been something stirring in me for the past few months, and it really began to bubble and boil in the last couple of weeks. Just pray for me in this season--it's gonna be a good one.